MOVING is one of the three most stressful experiences in life.

There are two very different kinds of needs that people have while moving. First there are the transactional needs, like finding the home that is right for you, finding a seller who is realistic, negotiating the price, filling out the paperwork, handling the escrow, and arranging for the move. But there are also emotional needs, and this is where the biggest stress comes in. Any competent agent will handle the transactional needs for you, but if your emotional needs are unfulfilled, you'll be frustrated and may not act in your own best interests. The ideal real estate agent is one who is competent with paperwork and numbers, but also guides, directs, and counsels you through the emotional ups and downs. Here are the six best ways I've found to beat the stress.

1. Begin With the End In Mind.

Have an ultimate scenario of where you're trying to be. What will life be like when you get there? How will it be better than where you are now? Dwell on that picture and write it out. Fill up at least a page about how it feels in the new place. Having the goal in front of you at all times energizes you to achieve it, in spite of setbacks and frustrations. Emotions will run high and you need an anchor.

2. Be Flexible.

In this market, anything can happen between contract acceptance and closing. It could be that inspections reveal areas of concern that the seller is unwilling to fix or the repair costs are higher than the amount limited in the contract. Interest rate changes can affect your monthly payment or even the down payment. Purchasing a home is a team effort (you, your agent, the seller, his agent, your lender, his processor, closer and investor, the escrow officer, to name a few.) It involves a lot of factors and personalities. Anger and frustration can result if you expect every detail to be "perfect." As your real estate agent, I will strive to tie up loose ends as quickly as possible, but remember there is no perfect world. When you are aware that situations may arise and need to be dealt with, you will probably find that the process is smoother than you expected.

3. Trust In the Process.

Most buyers feel a bit overwhelmed when taking on a new mortgage and the responsibilities of a new home. There's just so much to do, it's easy to panic. You think you're taking a big chance, but the truth is you're giving yourself a big chance. Even though you can't see every step of the way, as you move forward, the way opens up. We know that you haven't moved in a long time and it's a major upheaval in your life, but you've probably been there before. Trust that I will be looking out for you.

4. Get Knowledge.

One thing you'll probably feel during this transition time is being out of control. It feels like everyone else has taken over your life. The seller, your lender, the appraiser, the inspectors, they all have the power to say yes or no to your moving plans. I will try my best to let you know ahead of time what your expenses will be, and what the unknowns are. We'll get your loan approved as soon as possible. I'll educate you as best as I can and try to answer every question you have so you won't ever feel "out of the loop."

5. What Are Your Options?

When things don't go as smoothly as you had hoped, don't let emotions take over. Always ask yourself "What is my option?" There are always options. Let's pretend the lender takes longer than agreed upon to get your loan. He keeps asking you for more and more documentation until if feels like he also needs to know how many fillings you have in your mouth! You're upset because of the uncertainty. You want to say "Forget it, I'm fed up with this!" But what is your option? Find a new lender and start the process over again? That may take weeks, plus you will have to provide all the paperwork over again. If the lender is trying his best, it may be better to give him a few more days. Each case is unique, but when setbacks occur we've found that calmly asking yourself this question helps to defuse the situation and restore clear thinking.

6. Seek Entertainment.

When there's nothing you can do about the situation, take your mind off of it altogether. Maybe you expected loan approval on Friday, but now it won't come until Monday. You hate being in limbo and feeling powerless, so do something else, something where you aren't powerless. Take a hike, play tennis, get out of town for the day, watch a movie, pray, or pour yourself into your work. Whatever diversion works best for you, now would be a good time to engage in it. Refuse to listen to irritating thoughts when they come into your head. Take it one day at a time. To keep stress to a minimum, here's how I'll serve you when you work with me when buying your new home: 1. Give my best-reasoned expert counsel and advice with your best interests in mind, 2. Clarify your goals and motivation, 3. Provide recommendations and information to help your kids through all the changes. 4. Negotiate effectively for you to get the lowest possible price for your new home, Treat your money like it was my own, shaving expenses when possible, 5. Protect your interests during escrow, keeping a record of the transaction, 6. Counsel you through the feelings of "buyer's remorse", 7. Alert you ahead of time to possibilities so you feel more in control, 8. Contact you frequently during the last week of the transaction to keep things coordinated, 9. Provide guidance and help with movers, change of address, utilities shut off, cleaning, etc. 10. Deliver your closing paperwork when possible. 11. Continue to give you information of value after the transaction... for life.

For more information please contact me at susanmorrow@homesvegas.com